A few week’s ago I did my first Podcast & was asked to talk about my menopause experiences & how yoga & mindfulness have helped me navigate this huge transition.
We got chatting about the odd stigma surrounding the menopause. It’s hardly talked about until you’re in the thick of it, when had you known more what to expect because it was openly discussed, it might not have been so chaotic & frightening…for-armed is for-warned & all that!
Reflecting back to this time last year when things were the most chaotic & frightening I could only dream that we would be where we are today. I had no idea that I was as broken as I was because of the menopause & the lack of oestrogen in my body. I thought I was just broken. I thought it was all my fault & so of course there was a layer of blame & judgment.
As soon as I started to talking to friends I realized I wasn’t going mad on my own! I began to do some research & put the pieces of the puzzle together, do the work physically, mentally emotionally & spiritually, do the healing, get the ruddy HRT (there’s no other option at the moment ladies) & embrace this transition.
If you think about it 200-odd year’s ago we’d be dead by now so our bodies simply haven’t evolved to keep oestrogen pumping through our bodies for as long again. So the decline in oestrogen causes the menopause, almost every woman will experience it & it has far reaching physical, emotional & mental consequences that are life changing for many women & yet there is an odd taboo about talking about it.
When I realized my friends were struggling with similar side affects I realized the importance of the shared experience & our sense of a common humanity. We all feel pain & suffering: the pain I feel in difficult & challenging times is the same as the pain you feel in difficult & challenging times, the triggers may be different but the basic experience is the same.
When we remind ourselves that failure & / or hardship are part of the shared human experience we see that moment as one of togetherness not isolation. And since almost every woman is going through the menopause why aren’t we talking more openly & honestly about it?
Talking & connection is a huge piece in the healing puzzle, up there with there’s no finish point, it’s all within, everything you need in within you not out there & yup, we’re all in it together. Suddenly there is a sense of connection instead of separation & that’s hugely empowering.
If you think about it, we chose to incarnate on this planet for a reason: there were some lessons we were drawn here to learn from. If we don’t learn from them, they will keep cropping up & biting us on the bum until we do!
The Universe will make these lessons increasingly uncomfortable until it’s so bad it’s easier to do the hard work of healing than keep going through the same pain.
And I think that’s why the menopause can be such an empowering time of transformation for women. It certainly was the case for me. I felt so utterly broken, lost, stuck & miserable & I knew I had to do something more: I had to do the healing.
And knowing & understanding we are always changing & healing, that’s all part of the process, I didn’t take it so personally, I could instead start looking it as an opportunity.
So I did the work: I upp’d my yoga & meditation, I started listening to audible books so I could access some of the teaching of my favourite guru’s, re-reading the book if it really resonated, I got the HRT (I’m just being honest, there’s no other way right now), I watched my energy, did some processing work & decided it was time to heal, oh & practiced practiced practiced.
They say you never forget the time you make that decision to heal: I remember mine. I don’t remember the date but I can remember where I was standing in my kitchen, who I was talking to & when it hit me like a lightening bolt: however much of this is menopausal it is time to heal.
And that’s why I’m really grateful for the experience of the past 12 months & what I actually believe the menopause is all about…a time of transition, healing & growth in preparation for the best years of your life.