As a 50 year old woman you would’ve thought I would know a little about the menopause. But deep down I still think I’m 25 – when the hairdresser makes me laugh & I see the rich tapestry of laughter lines weaving their message of a life well lived around my eyes reflected back at me in the mirror, I’m always a little shocked.
So even though my periods had stopped (I thought this was because I had a coil) I was channelling my inner Peter Pan – the menopause wasn’t happening to me, after all I hadn’t put on weight & I wasn’t sweating…talk about being in denial!
It was only when it felt like my mental health was spiralling out of control that I began to investigate & discovered the subtler signs of menopause, also known as the 7 dwarves of menopause & could literally tick every one.
But it was the anxiety that really kicked my proverbial. I’ve always been a bit of a worrier but I would never have classified that as anxiety. Suddenly I was anxious as f*^k & then one day I thought I was having a heart attack. It was terrifying. I was walking the dogs & doubled over in pain & terror thinking how can I be having a heart attack? At 50 I’m probably in the best shape I’ve ever been in, how could I be having a heart attack?
Then I discovered it was probably a panic attack & someone sent me an article in which the menopause, anxiety &…caffeine & alcohol.
Hormonal changes that are caused by the onset of perimenopause or menopause can cause anxiety & panic attacks. The drop in oestrogen triggers a chain reaction which includes spiking adrenaline – bosh: moodiness, forgetfulness, anxiety & yep you guessed it panic attacks.
This is why watching or even ditching your caffeine & alcohol intake is an important part of managing your menopausal symptoms because both aggravate that chain reaction, antagonising the moodiness & anxiety. I’d already pretty much cut alcohol out completely because I just had no filter when I had even 1 glass of wine & would be even snappier than I already was.
But caffeine that was new to me although in hindsight it made perfect sense. When I was anxious, I tended to stop eating & start drinking more coffee to power me through – the thing was the additional caffeine was making things worse. So I it was obvious I needed to ditch the caffeine but I LOVE my 2 cups of coffee in the morning. Since decaffeinated coffee is quite a chemically loaded process I switched to swiss water decaf beans…no nasty chemicals & no caffeine!
These 2 changes certainly seemed to help but I also credit my daily yoga & mindfulness practice with helping too.
How?
Well exercise is also great for alleviating panic attacks & anxiety & this is where yoga is SO powerful. Yoga is a conscious form of exercise which units the body with the breath & these slower smoother breaths together with the intentional movements help to calm the mind – goodbye anxiety!
Exercise also helps to release happy hormones into the brain which help to offset the production of adrenalin & cortisol the stress hormones associated which are running riot in menopause & when your anxiety ramps up.
Meanwhile mindfulness helped me manage my anxiety & ultimately the panic attacks by helping me to be aware of what was happening before it turned into full blown panic attack.
As soon as realised that I wasn’t having a heart attack like I thought but that it was in fact a panic attack, I began to recognise the thoughts, feelings, emotions & behaviours that precipitated them: racing thoughts & heart, feeling incredibly overwhelmed, emotional & out of control, trembling, sweaty palms. I used my mindfulness training to recognise these symptoms before they became a full blown panic attack.
Something else we learn in mindfulness & when practicing meditation is that our thoughts are just that: thoughts. They are not necessarily fact. When we practice mindfulness we practice a spacious distance to our thoughts, stepping away from them becoming the observer rather than getting swept away by them & down the rabbit hole.
So I applied the same technique to the panic attack as it was brewing. I’d say to myself: this isn’t real, this is just menopause kicking your arse, this is just hormones, it’s not real, this is just anxiety it’s not real. And it worked so well it stopped me having a full blown panic attack whilst I was out walking the dog one day. And I haven’t had a panic attack since!
Of course, I know it isn’t ‘just’ anxiety & panic attacks – they are both terrifying experiences & I am by no means belittling the enormous impact both these have on anyone. But by framing them as ‘just’ menopause, ‘just’ hormones (or lack thereof), ‘just’ anxiety it helped them to feel less terrifying & not to escalate.
I also credit daily time on my yoga mat & meditation cushion, which affords me some much needed peace, calm & serenity, with also giving me the headspace to work out what I needed to do to get better because my menopausal symptoms were ruining life.
I was reflecting recently with a friend, & in fairness I do have a tendency for the melodramatic, & credited yoga & mindfulness with saving my life. I told her it was so bad, I was so miserable, that if I hadn’t had my daily practice to anchor & ground me that I didn’t think I would be here. An Australian study on suicide rates identifies that suicide is highest in the 45-49 age group in women & second highest in the 50-54 year olds. And I can believe it.
I did also end up going down the HRT route. I investigated the herbal approach but concluded that I was so utterly broken & miserable that flower petals just didn’t seem to cut. I am also blessed to have a brother who specialises in helping menopausal women loose the weight they gain & so he is well versed in all things menopause & could guide me that the information about the risks of HRT are massively out of date.
Things have changed a great deal since that 20 year old study came out: there are now around 50 different combinations of HRT you can try to get the correct dose; go for body identical not bio-identical HRT & that the risks from NOT taking HRT (heart disease being the highest risk) far outweigh the risks of taking it. HRT became a no brainer.
HRT combined with limiting alcohol, no caffeine, daily yoga & mindfulness have made a huge impact at reducing the symptoms. And I do, I feel better than ever & I’m much more mindful when my symptoms ramp up, like they did recently, & speaking up & getting the help & correct treatment. It’s crucial to keep trying to get the help & support you need, there really is no need to suffer in silence anymore.
If you would like to add yoga & mindfulness to your arsenal of coping mechanisms & would like to know how working with me I can guide you on a journey of self-discovery that isn’t limited to just yoga & mindfulness but brings in a whole host of holistic practices in a very down to earth way simply email me at alex@alexbannard.com.